Sometimes when your soul hurts, you go through seasons when your liveliness dims. Each day requires more concealer to cover the deepening darkness beneath your eyes. Sometimes the concealer is in the form of laughter, of a smile, of pouring out even more, of many "I'm fine"s. In life, we do have to hide our sadness in many settings, or at least we feel we have to, for fear of pity, or weighing others down, or simply for emotional privacy. Covering sadness is not necessarily a bad thing, but denying yourself the privilege of your own feelings can become a very bad thing. Do not bottle your emotions. Do not deny yourself the freedom of the way you feel. At the same time, it's not good to allow yourself to dwell there. Don't live in sadness, or anger, or anxiety. But don't be afraid when the circumstances around you and your internal struggle need to visit and explore the land of human emotion.
Even Christ, in the Garden of Gathsemane, succumbed to sorrow, overwhelmed with grief to the point of death in an emotional sense. He cried out, asking for another way, pleading with the Father to spare Him from what was to come. Yet, when the time came for Him to move on, when the moment came, He rose and met the long prophesied moment with a calm demeanor. So cry your tears, blow a little steam to the wind, ask the questions, curl up and let the hurt out. But never forget to rise. Stand and meet the world again. A moment of weakness, when allowed, can sometimes bring even more strength. We all need to let it out sometimes, we implode otherwise. The strength of emotions can weigh hard, but don't fear them, and don't allow them to control you.
Matthew 26:38-39, 46
Then he said to them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.”
Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.”
Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!”
Luke 22:42-44
“Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.”
An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him. (Isn't that cool?! We have that same comfort because the Holy Spirit is in us when we are in Christ!)
And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.
Psalm 43:5
Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.
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